Asia rendezvous recap.

I'm sitting in the Lao airport right now. It's 6:30am. I'm a bit foggy, a bit anxious and a teensy bit sad. Gave Linda a quick hug this morning before jetting out the door. I'm going to miss my funny, tell-it-like-it-is Dutch traveling partner. I've had two pretty amazing months, and now I'm preparing for my second half of the journey. Though indonesia is also southeast Asia, it seems to be an entity all it's own.

Cambodia was my favorite country in SE Asia. The people were incredibly kind and genuine, the prices were much cheaper than anywhere else I traveled, and the sights were outstanding. The travelers you met in Cambodia were a different breed...not there for the party like most that you meet in Thailand or Laos.

Though Thailand was overrun by tourists and jaded Thai people, PAI in northern Thailand was hands town my favorite town in all of SE Asia. Quaint, intimate, amazing. A sort of Utopia. A place filled with really outstanding food, cheap and delicious street food as well as inexpensive restaurants that offered up outrageously stupendous dishes. Also, here is where I had my good friends Ramzi, Linda...and of course, Mick. Pai is where I began to feel like myself again after such a shitty year. I will definitely be making a return trip....sooner rather than later.

And then there is Laos. The "fuckall hatefest" Laos. I know that my friend Emily Corkill will adamantly disagree...but Laos was absolutely my least favorite country. Yes, many Lao people have a smile on their face, but that's because they are ripping you off; you know it- they know it- and theres not much that you can do about it. The rain definitely tainted my experience here, along with the whole stolen bike scenario- but the trip was saved by the beautiful landscapes, delicious local food (laap, jaew mak len, Lao salad...I could go on) and of course- rock climbing. Almost every inch of Laos looks like a postcard. The heart of mother nature lives in the limestone cliffs of Vang Vieng (it's just a shame that the town has become overrun with inappropriately drunk and inconsiderate Brits). It was impossible to take a BAD picture in Laos...whether you were in the old sleepy town of Luang Prabang, party town and outdoor adventure destination Vang Vieng, or the french-inspired capital of Vientiane. If it weren't the case that I was blatantly ripped off Atleast once a day then maybe I'd leave with a better taste in my mouth. Oh well, a great time was still had, a new sport acquired, and some fabulous new friends were made.

And now- a short flight to Bangkok, several hours of killing time in Bangkok International before my afternoon flight to Jakarta, then to Bali. I can't wait to be reunited with my Meesh, and to be reunited with my beloved ocean...it's been too long.

On The Inside.

Ratha Kong and Michele.

I am having a great time- you can tell that from reading the blog, viewing my pictures, and following my facebook. I have a smile on my face 98% of the time- and on the occasion that I feel anger or sadness, it passes as quickly as it arrives. Any bit of emotions going on Inside of me I have chosen to ignore- though lately they've been surfacing after an intense physical practice followed by a deep meditation. Most people fully accept my smile, but there's been two people who have called me on my bullshit: Ratha Kong and Meesh.

Ratha Kong is a Khmer woman who works at a fancy hotel in Siem Reap. Her and the Borgeious's (my good friends, yoga students and surf buddies) became friends after they stayed at the hotel a few years back. Before I left the states, Eileen sent me with a gift for Ratha. I made my way to the hotel to deliver the package, and after I dropped it off she asked that I return in a few hours. A bit after sunset I headed back to the hotel. Ratha had a thank you note and a gift for me. She sat down with me in the fouer and asked about my trip. Then she said "Are you happy?". Her English isn't that great, so I figured that she was just asking 'how are things?!'. With a huge grin on my face, I replied "Absolutely!!". Afterall, I WAS having a great time, and I WAS happy. She didn't buy it, replying, "No, but are you HAPPY ...on the Inside???". Well fuck, I broke down. Heavy year. And a complete stranger saw right through me.

Last night at dinner, Meesh looked at me and said "Okay Cailin, what the fuck is going on? I read your blog, I know what's going on in your life- but let's be honest. What the fuck is going on? You don't have to be fucking superwoman. As soon as you walked into the hotel the other day I just knew that something was off with you." well- it was a loooooong dinner. We talked and talked. Shawn, Dad, Dad, Dad, feeling lost a bit in this new chapter of life- blah blah blah. "Heavy. Fucking Heavy." ...that was her response.

Both Meesh and Ratha helped me to realize that it's okay to keep smiling through the bad, but you also need to mourn- otherwise (as Meesh would say) "Fuck man, it'll fucking kill you!".
So starting today, I'm going to give some love and attention to what's going on inside....

Island Life: TROPICAL STORM

Island Life: Home Sweet Home

Island Life: Dirty Dogs

There's mama and papa, and their children...Flea Bag 1 & 2 (FB1&FB2 for short). They are so goddamn cute and so very sweet, I cuddle them constantly despite being infested with fleas. This country is FULL of puppies- but every dog and young pup runs from humans. It drives me crazy! So to my delight, when we arrived at the island there were puppies- that ran TO me instead of AWAY. They are absolutely adorable and they all have the sweetest demeanor. Tonight we experienced an insane tropical storm- with horrendous wind, torrential downpour and insane thunder and lightening. Of course, we invited the wet fleabags to take refuge in our bungalow. They are quivering under the beds as I type this up on my iPhone!! Tomorrow they will wake with me, accompany me to the bathroom, then the dock for yoga and then they'll sit at my feet while I enjoy breakfast. I feel really at home on this island. Beautiful sea, fresh fish, lovely people and lovely dogs. What more do you need?!

Island Life: Fishing Kids

Woke up at 6am today and headed down to the dock to do some sunrise yoga. Well, I made it about 15minutes into my routine, saw the sun rise, and then the dock was taken over by hoardes of small children with beer cans. Wrapped around these empty cans was fishing line, and tied to the end of the fishing line was a small hook. On the hook went a piece of squid, though some were tossed in with nothing at all. These kids started handlining anything that they could catch off of the dock. They worked their lines like seasoned pros, and with complete seriousness. This wasn't for shits and giggles-- this was for food. One of the kids spoke a touch of english, and he posted up next to me and helped explain how it was done. The Queen of the dock was the tiniest girl, who had a handful of small fish at a pile by her feet. Once the small children headed home, one of the older boys headed out and came back with a nice catch. What were YOU doing at 630am when you were 5 years old? I bet that you weren't out catching the days lunch...

I got two cute videos of them doing their thing. Going to try and post some on here....

Sinville.

Sinville. Skankville. Sexville. Call it whatever you'd like-- it is simply NOT the place for me. Beautiful Cambodia, the country that I have come to know and love over these past few weeks, should totally disown this town. This town drags em down. Bleh. Within moments of arriving at the overcrowded beaches, we were bombarded- no...ATTACKED, but peddlers. Pushing manicures, threading, hair braiding, bracelets and massages- they wouldn't take no for an answer. We mozied down the beach to attempt to find any spot that was a but more mellow. Just when we thought we'd found a somewhat decent spot to relax, Gillian got up to jump in the ocean- missing a used needle and syringe that was lying in the sand by only a centimeter!! Old fat men with prostitutes scattered the beaches, as did young drunk men looking to get laid. We heard that SnookieVille was bad, by we didn't think that it would live up to the stories we'd heard...

I have only 4 days left- not enough time to venture elsewhere. I'd hate to end my amazing trip to Cambodia on a bad note so I've decided to plan a trip onto one of the outlying islands ASAP. Im going to eat obscene amounts of delicious, fresh, inexpensive seafood- and im going to drink myself silly so that I can laugh and the nonsense of this town.

Just booked 2 nights on an island, "lazy beach", along with 3 days of snorkeling. No Internet, so no updates for a bit. Wish me luck!

Sent from my iPhone

"Break out the champagne"

Received an email from my mom this morning...an email that I have anxiously been anticipating since my Dad got an MRI last week. The worry has really been eating away at me since my arrival here-- guilt for being away, anxiety for the unknown, and sadness for the grim possibilities. I have been having an amazing time- but there was always an underlying stress. Well- now I can continue my travels without such a heavy heart.

My moms email...

Begin forwarded message:

Hey everybody, the tumor, mass, whatever you want to call it, is still there (as it will always be), but when the doctors at the Brain Tumor Conference looked at it the other day, it not only looked the same, it actually looked better. They only call it NON-SIGNIFICANT CHANGES. I call it AWESOME!
Eileen the nurse is my main contact. I love her. She is going to set us up with a neuro-ophthalmologist at Penn. She will make all the calls , which means we will get in there quickly. Paul's main problem right now is his vision.He has almost a double vision when he uses both eyes looking at a distance. He has good vision out of both , as long as he's only using one at a time. If he looks out of both at the same time he gets dizzy. Eventually that leads to a headache. He's been wearing an eye patch and that works , but it also limits him. The doctors were told about this, and they had the results of his Field Vision test that he had down here last month , but they don't see a direct link to the tumor, so now we are going to see the EYE experts and try to solve this problem.Hopefully they can figure this out.
For now we just relax for another 3 months when we will have another MRI. Except for the eye, and the right side numbness, Paul is feeling great. He rarely ever needs naps, he's sharp as a tack, he can focus on reading again, he's getting stronger, he's been helping me dry dogs when I need him. He's taking care of making his veggie juices, he's "kitchen boy " all of which helps me to no end.
Cailin will be able to continue her traveling with no worries. We can continue to live and love every day that God gives us. Please keep us in your prayers, keep the love and good vibes coming our way. Another plus is that Paul is probably going to take early retirement.The company has made a great offer and he's considering it, so if all goes well he will be a farmer, hunter, fisherman, doggie drier, great father, husband, and all the other things he's always been for many years to come.

Sam: this is it.
Frodo: this is what?
Sam: if I take one more step, it'll be the farthest away from home I've ever been.
Frodo: come on Sam. Remember what bilbo used to say: "it's a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet theres no knowing where you might be swept off to."

The Infirmary

I have nicknamed our room the infirmary. Gillian has a chest cold that is wicked, Tom has been battling travelers tummy for a few days, and out of the blue last night I starter vomiting....alot- along with an occasional unwanted poo. What the fuck?! Where did this come from. We got home past midnight last night - Gilly was hacking up a lung, I threw up then had a poo, and Tom was managing to keep it together. We turned of the lights and laid in bed- then Tom declared whoever was the first to have to run to the bathroom was buying drinks the next day. Damn, good times on the regular.

I <3 Kampot, Cambodia.

I have really enjoyed every bit of Cambodia. I appreciated starting my trip in tourist-friendly Siem Reap- got my feet wet, saw the beautiful temples and enjoyed cheap prices for food, boarding and shopping. Battambang was sleepy, but the boat ride there was beautiful, and I gotta say that I enjoyed visiting the winery!! Next was Kampong Cham- another sleepy town, but on the beautiful Mekong and with a few really yummy restaurants. In Kratie I saw the are Irrawaddy dolphins, relaxed on the docks with my feet in the Mekong and discovered my favorite Cambodian treat: bananas steamed with coconut rice! Ban Lung was cool and peaceful, and or bungalow in the trees was a real oasis. Trekking along the Ho Chi Min trail in the Ratanakiri Province was an adventure, and though it was freezing at night, sleeping outside in a hammock was great! Also a special treat was meeting Chris who took us into very remote, "never seen a tourist before" villages where he was building schools. Playing Proud Mary for 118 Khmer kids was wild, something ill never forget. Phnom Penh showed me a whole new side of Cambodia, the progress that is in the process since the devastating Khmer Rouge. Visiting the killing fields and S21 makes you appreciate the Khmer people even more- because despite their tragic recent past, they always meet you with a smile and kind words. It was great to relax on the seashore at Kep and eat crabs & prawns til near explosion-- it made me feel like I was back at home, picking crabs round the table, washing em down with beers. Now we are in Kampot, which I think is my favorite place in Cambodia. Out of the places I've visited, it is the one where the Khmer Rouges destruction is most visible....black, destroyed buildings, homes that are just a pile of rubble, and skeletons of haunted buildings. But it's also the most beautiful- with the mountains, the river, and the people. The food here is excellent and the pace is just right. The last stop for my stay in Cambodia is Sihanoukville. Every single person that has mentioned this place has nothin but awful things to say about it. Skankville. Sinville. Dirty, crowded, touristy and unsafe. SO: we will be passing up the town for a trip to some of the outlying islands. Then- I'm off to Thailand. Round II of the journey is just round the corner...

Bokor Mountain Lodge Music.

Been playing heaps of music since my arrival in Cambodia. I'm totally blown away by the quantity AND quality of the musicians that are calling this country home. The past two nights I've played music with two fine gentlemen...Shawn (guitar, harmonica) and Eric (I THINK that was his name, on acoustic bass). These two rock- playing a ton of music that speaks to my heart- stuff that my mother sang and played for me. Love it. They started up at 6pm yesterday and we played until it was past midnight!! Its nights like these that really fuel my love and passion for playing music. Thanks guys!

Bunchao Bunchao Bunchaoooo

Today Tom had some business to attend to, so Gilly and I headed off to breakfast @ Epic Arts Cafe. Well surprise surprise, we run into our old traveling partners Marie (France) and Marloes (holland) !!!!!! So exciting! We decided to head out for the salt valley, the Kampot pepper fields and the Phnom Chhnork Cave. It was a full day extravaganza, so to refuel we stopped for our beloved dish, BUNCHAO. Sipping cocktails now by the riverside, watching the sunset- so grateful to be reunited with these two lovely ladies!

Cambodian Thank You

To say "thank you" in Khmer you say...

1. Ah Kuhn (thank you)
2. Ah Kuhn Jaran (thank you very much)
3. Ah Kuhn Tom Tom (big big thank you)

But today I was in a deaf establishment, so I said thank you with ASL (American Sign Language). Turns out, you sign it differently in Khmer! In ASL to say thank you have a flat hand, palm facing you body, fingertips touching your mouth. Then you lower the hand so it's pointing out. In Khmer Sign Language you have your hands in prayer by your face. Then you release the right hand to draw a circle with it (an outward twist of the wrist) and then bring the hands back to prayer!

Epic Arts Cafe

Epic Arts Cafe
Kampot, Cambodia
www.epicarts.org.uk

"A great place for breakfast or scrumptious cakes with tea or coffee. Staffed by deaf and disabled young people, this funky eatery can also pack a bagel lunch for a trip up to Bokor. Profits fund dance, music and art education for deaf and disabled Cambodians." -- Lonely Planet Cambodia

I had the most spectacular breakfast this morning: Fine Herb Omlette with slow roasted chilli tomato, caramelized onion and a toasted bagel. And I had French press coffee, the beans from Laos (they make the best!). I was moaning as I bathed my delicious bagel in rich butter. I spread the perfectly roasted tomatoes that were sweet and delicate onto my bagel- stacking on the smooth caramelized onions and topping off the bite with a touch of Omlette. Literally moaning out loud. We are spending an extra day in Kampot JUST so that we can eat more meals from here! The owner is a deaf woman from SEATTLE. Amazing.

Your Yoga

Gillian is always referring to the yoga that I do as YOUR YOGA. "Did you do your yoga today?" or "I saw you doing your yoga this morning, it was lovely." And she refers to the yoga that she does as MY YOGA. I always kinda wondered why the hell she didn't just say YOGA- I mean, yoga is yoga, no need for the yours and mine. But after some thought, I think that Gilly is spot on. It is MY yoga- my own spiritual and personal practice catering to my bodys needs and my souls needs. Gillian and I have completely different practices but each one is perfect for our individual needs. They keep us healthy and happy and grounded.

Tom asked me about teaching him some yoga. I thought that he'd giggle throughout or halfass his way through. Not that Tom is that kind of person, but I find that most men struggle with the first few classes. Well, I need to eat my words, because Tom was one of the BEST students that I've ever had. He was open and attentive, and LISTENING. Through most of the class he had his eyes closed, so instead of trying to watch me the whole time, instead he listened and found his way. Beautiful. At 6'6", he was a bit awkward getting in and out of poses, and he wasn't very flexible- but I know that this will come with time and some regular practice.

I hope that everyone out there is enjoying THEIR YOGA...it makes life a happy healthier place.

Pass It On...

I was gifted a guitar from Dan (of Phnom Penh) the other day. It was such a great gift-- but it definitely was going to be a hefty addition to my already heavy load. Not to mention, I already HAD a guitar with me. I played it all evening and for two days. This afternoon, we packed our rucsac's and waited for our TukTuk driver to arrive so we could leave for Kampot. I sat on the beautiful deck, mildly stressed about what the hell I was going to do with this kind gift, the extra baggage. While we were waiting, one of the Khmer staff picked up my new gift and was completely fascinated. He was by no means a guitar player, but he could manage a few chords. He asked me a few questions about it and 'how much'. Well, my dilemma was solved!!! I gave the guitar to him-- it took 20minutes to explain this to him, that it was a gift, FREE, and when he finally realized what I was saying and that I was serious, he was grinning from ear to ear. I played him, and the whole staff (who had slowly congregated around the music and commotion) a few songs. They were an attentive audience, completely entranced by my tunes. The woman from the kitchen made me a fruit smoothie for free, and they sent us with bottles of water. When I handed over the guitar, he still had a look on his face saying "this is simply too good to be true." As we drove away in the TukTuk, I felt Damn Good....

Valentines Day.

Tom and Gillian.

I'm spending valentines day with TWO amazing valentines! Such a lucky gal! It just so happens that my one valentine is a 47year old woman, and a young gay brit - but I can't think of anyone better to ring in this 'holiday' with. Tomorrow the three of us are on a mission to find some hot men...wish us luck...

Rabbit Island.

Why it's called Rabbit Island, I have no idea; it contains no rabbits and the island in no way resembles one. But the water is crystal clear + warm, and the sunshine is bright- a perfect place for an afternoon jaunt. The TukTuk picked us up a little before 9 and dropped us at the boats. Some people had their packs with them- they'd be staying overnight in one of the huts. When we arrived on shore, Tom, Gillian and I decided to go exploring and walk all the way around the island. On our way I recognized a woman from Tree Top and invited her to join us. Marsha, a photographer from the US, is the first American traveler that I have met since I've arrived in Southeast Asia. We were having a nice walk until Tom started screaming. The six foot six giant was squealing like a girl because he'd brushed into some fire ants. I couldn't help myself...I began to laugh and simply couldn't stop! I was laughing so hard that I almost pee'd my dang pants. He's freaking out. I attempted to calm Jim a bit and assured him that we were close to the beach and we'd rinse off in a minute. Then, he howls again. "there's something stuck in my foot....I can't walk! I can't walk!!!" My first reaction- laughter. Followed by the thought, what a pussy! Gillian and marsha also responded with laughter- 3 tough women totally taken off guard by the dramatic reaction of this extremely tall man. Needless to say, we busted his balls for the rest of the day. Turns out that we couldn't walk all the way around the island and had to have one of the local fisherman take us around back to the main beach. We all enjoyed a swim and some good conversation- then Gilly and I set off for a beachside massage. I had a one hour coconut oil massage, right on the beach with the beautiful breeze, for $7. It was heavenly. Absolutely heavenly. Enjoyed our remaining time on the island before catching the 4pm shuttle boat back to Kep. We are salty and sandy and sleepy. All of us are enjoying our beverages of choice (me: hot tea with milk, gilly: hot Ginger tea with lemon, and Tom: iced coffee with milk). We are gonna rest up, shower up, then head back to the crab market for some fresh crabs and prawns!

8ctopus.

8CTOPUS.
A badass French band.
Check them out...
Not now, RIGHT NOW.

Last night when we went to Kukuluku in town to see Dan and his band (the Phnom Penh Hippie Orhestra) play, we weren't sure what to expect. Well, the place was packed! In the band was Dan on drums, a guitarist, bassist, trumpet, clarinet, fiddle, trumbone, accordion, a small oddly shaped Russian guitar and two others. The music was fun: gypsy street music. By the true stars of the show was a band from France...8CTOPUS. Out-fucking-standing. A young group of handsome French gentlemen- they totally rocked the house. The main two guys were on trombone and trumpet. The others played trumpet, baritone, some other type of horn, and 3 guys on drums. I haven't been so excited about music in quite awhile...and this music made you want to do backflips. They danced and shouted and played the shit outta their horns. The crowd went wild. Like a more upbeat, hip, excited version of he band BEIRUT. All of them are about the age of those in University. They are here playing music with street kids of Cambodia. Their music was totally unreal, and still has me grinning.