not all who wander are lost.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

...I'm back.

Yes. I'm back. Sorry that I was away for so long. The new drug that my Dad is on, Tarceva, has really been kicking his ass -- and in turn, it's really weighed heavy on me. I hate to see him in pain, and there is nothing that I can do about it. He has sores all over his face, head, chest, back, and inside his mouth and throat. He's been unable to really eat anything at all, and even drinking has become a problem. He is tired and in pain and laughing and chatting is about the last thing on his list of things to do. It's the first time that I've really seen him sick, and it has scared the shit outta me. Needless to say, we have been BOMBARDED by family and friends. There has not been one night in the past 2 weeks that we HAVEN'T had people at the house for dinner. 15 people, 8 people, 4 people, 19 people...for breakfast, or lunch, or dinner or all of the above. This would stress most people out, but my mom {oddly enough} finds this chaos very comforting, and with all of these people around there is certainly no lack of love in this house. Dad has gone from being the life of the party, to a quiet observer - something completely foreign to me. It has taken some getting used to, but the rest of the Callahan's are also quite good at being the center of attention - so there is never a dull night. I finally purchased a VIDEO CAMERA and drum roll iPhone!! Hello Technology!!! I had a nightmare the other night that I'd forgotten the sound of my Dad's voice and his beautiful blue eyes...I woke up on the brink of an anxiety attack, so later that day I went out and bought a video camera. Hopefully he will be feeling better soon, because most of the video thus far has been me going around a huge dinner table introducing everyone and showcasing the delicious dinner, but Dad's been feeling too rotten to really take part in any filming.

SO: fingers crossed that this medicine works. It simply has to. And in the meantime, though Dad is feeling rotten, we have filled our house with love - enjoying lots of family meals around the table, and lots of Twilight...

Photos to come!!

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