shucks...

My mom is pretty amazing with words, and this is her latest email update about my Dad, which she dedicated to me. Thanks to my parents for bringing me into this world 25 years ago:

A quick shout out to Jan and her husband Rich for making us soups and giving Paul a great long sleeved T-Shirt from the Avalon Marine Center where they both work.Rich told me he loves to start his day reading my updates.I love you guys. Thanks to Mindy for coming over on Sunday with a full meal that she shared with us. Excellent. Salad, pasta ,bread. I sent her home with pheasant. it was a good trade. Toni continues to bring us goodies and hang out with us about every other week.Its always a good time. Jason came by with bagels the other day. Then he went walking with us. He is a great husband , father and friend. We are lucky to have him in our corner. So many other people continue to write , call, stop by, and in general keep us in great spirits. Its such a nice feeling being loved. Now to get to the main subject of this letter.My daughter. My 4 hours away from being 25 year old daughter. I often skim over Cailin in these letters. Actually its a little painful at times to talk about the sacrifices she has made recently, so I tend to keep it inside. Today she posted a blog about her birthdays abroad. Its fantastic. She has not been home to celebrate her birthday since she was 20 years old. Each winter , after working and saving all her hard earned summer money, she travels. She lives and breathes traveling. She loves us, and South Jersey in the summer, but winter here is rather tortuous for her. Thank God this winter has been so mild. Cailin has never been good at sitting around. She needs to be busy and experiencing new things every day.Well, this year she decided she needed to be here for her dad. She has been teaching yoga, giving massages, playing an occasional music gig, doing a little catering, but for the most part has been just hanging with us. Let's face it. We used to be exciting as hell , but recently we aren't exactly setting the world on fire. We keep telling her that Dad is fine, and she should take to the open road , but still she stays. She's been helping in the best ways she can and I just want her to know how much we love her. 25 years ago we drove down the GSP yelling to the toll guy that we were having a baby. It was the start of a very special relationship. It takes about a minute of being a parent when you realize you would walk through fire for your child .In my case, I know I'd come rescue her no matter where in the world she was. Liam Nesson in TAKEN has nothing on me. We love you "As big as the Universe" Cailin. Thanks for hanging around. And Happy Happy Birthday. Love, Mom and Dad

Birthday Celebrations.

And so my official birthday began....

Gina crawled into bed with me at 7am and we digested Twilight. We watched Twilight and Twilight New Moon yesterday - so it was a lot for her to take in at once. We discussed Edward, Bella, Jacob and Charlie in depth...she was prepared with her list of questions, and I was more than equipped and excited to answer. We had coffees and then headed to Surfside for my 9:15am yoga class.

When we got to yoga Samantha greeted me with a full platter of cupcakes and "25" candles....

Before heading to the bar some of us ladies threw down some cupcakes....

And then the fun began. Mimosas with fresh squeezed OJs followed by "Yoginis" : champagne, campari, st.germain, and fresh squeezed OJ, topped off with Blood Marys. Holy Shizballs. We hung at the bar for a few hours, chatting amongst good friends and sipping booze....

The key to this EPIC bloody was the CHIPOTLE VODKA. soooo good.

My birthday wouldn't be complete without Bridget by my side - hence us taking the party to HER because she couldn't get off of work. Also, a party with me aint a party until we've picked some oracle cards....

Now: Family Dinner.

GinaBeana!!

Gina is my best friend from college. She was the one person who I filled my days with...sipping coffees on campus, hanging around the art studio, or in each others apartments coming up with delicious creations. She drove down from Ramsey yesterday (3hrs) to be a part of my birthday celebration and I'm SO GRATEFUL that she's going to be at the table for family dinner. She made me my favorite, Rice Krispie treats, and after throwing several of those fluffy clouds of heaven we ate tuna fish sandwiches. Tunafish sandwiches were one of our stables- and I can't eat one without thinking of G. Ah, memories! She hasn't seen twilight yet (I know, I KNOW...this poor girl...), so yesterday we cuddled up on the couch and I caught her up to speed. Then we headed to my Yin yoga class and ultimately ended up in Avalon at the Whitebriar to see my friend Bridget. Bridg came up with a delicious cocktail, which we will call " the yogini ". It's a blend of all my favorite things: St.Germain, Campari, Champagne and fresh squeezed OJ! It was a great night that ended with G and I on the couch watching more twilight. And now, let the celebrations continue...

Birthdays Abroad

I haven't celebrated a birthday at home in several years. I'm really really really missing my vagabond winters, but it is nice to be home with my family during this time. Also, I have been BLESSED with an AMAZING community of yogi's (and yogini's) who have filled a huge void that was in my heart. Here's a reflection of the past several birthdays, and the amazing individuals that I celebrated with....

21

in Costa Rica

I hadn't told a soul that it was my 21st. I was in town all alone - my family had left and the two Norwegian girls Maja and Mari that I had been living with had left two days before. Apparently before they left they told our bartender. At sunset I got out of the water and mozied up to the bar in my bikini, still wet and salty. I ordered a coffee. I don't know why - I just had a hankering. Well I took a sip and was taken aback by the fact that it was half cafe rio (a coffee liquour!). Raj told me that I wasn't getting away without celebrating my birthday! Out came the balloons and bam - the celebration began and continued into the night. There was even a cake with candles!!

22

in Costa Rica

Back in Dominical for yet another birthday. My friend Taylor owns the popular bar in town, Que Nivel - and she sponsored by birthday...advertising for it all throughout town. Her friend, Costa Rican reggae musician NOAH offered to provide the entertainment and it was epic. Also, the following day my friend Callen had HIS birthday - so we had a joint celebration. His mom made an epic spread and we had a dinner party at the top of the hill in their beautiful home. Our friend Cassie even made handcrafted Lei's for us :)

Callen and Me :)

Noah, taking a break from singing to dance with me!

My local surf crew: Pepe, Ariel and Kevin.

My ladie loves in Domi :)

23

in Costa Rica

My friend Roni surprised me by organizing all of my friends in town, a bus, and a boat to an island - where there was lunch and ballons and all sorts of amazing shit!!! The celebration of a LIFETIME. To date, still the most amazing birthday!

My card from Mikey (he made them for me for all occassions)

Some of the ladies

Birthday Hats and Beers

24

in Thailand

My most recent birthday was in southeast Asia, in Chaing Mai, Thailand. I celebrated with TWO yoga classes in town and then headed out with my two favorite Dutch (Mick and Linda) for an epic celebration. We went to see a live Reggae band, and Mick had told them it was my birthday so the whole bar sang for me. Good times :)

Celebrating my 25th in Sri Lanka or New Zealand wouldn't be too shabby, but I'm super excited to be home with my family. I wonder where I'll ring it 26....

Cauliflower Soup for a Rainy Day.

The only reason I tolerate rainy days is because I have a great music library and because it gives me an excuse to cook up new recipes. I have been obsessed with cauliflower lately and have been having a blast in the kitchen as I find out new ways to enjoy it. I had a bowl of roasted cauliflower soup last week at Steve + Cookies which was the inspiration for my own creation. I walked around the kitchen and filled my arms with whatever we had around.

• 3/4 of a head of Cauliflower
• 2 random potatoes
• 1 yellow onion
• 2 cloves garlic
• 1 can of Cannelini (white) beans
  
• Pinot Grigio
• Dried Sage, Thyme and Rosemary (unfortunately no fresh herbs...)

I ALWAYS have "Better Than Bouillon" vegetable stock concentrate in my fridge...it is the best thing that you'll get if you aren't using a homemade stock. I still don't know much about cooking with wine, but I figured that it was too early to have a glass of wine (not to mention that I still have one more class to teach later today) but if I had to open it for cooking that I could at least enjoy a few sips....

One soup pot. Drizzle some olive oil in the bottom. Toss in 2 cloves of garlic, diced onion, diced cauliflower, and peeled + diced potatoes. Salt and pepper. Let it sautee in the pot for a bit and then add the dried herbs. After about 20minutes of sauteeing I add in a generous pour of white wine (1/2 cup? 1 cup?). I let that cook down for about 10 minutes over medium heat before adding a heaping tablespoon of the vegetable broth concentrate and adding water (so that it just covered what was in the pot). I let this cook over medium heat for awhile longer until everything in the pot was tender. Puree in batches using a food processor then return to the burner to simmer *this is an important step because it allows all the flavors to marry.

This is dairy-free, gluten free, vegan friendly and it is goddamn delicious. I gotta say, I'm pretty damn good in the kitchen.....

1. Sauteeing the diced ingredients

2. Adding stock to sauteed ingredients and letting simmer

3. Puree in batches and return to stovetop

4. Enjoy (preferably with the leftover wine that you used to cook with...)

Beach, Bridget, Barley and Blindfolds.

The sun was shining, so I texted my friend Bridget and asked if she wanted to hang out...maybe take Barley down to the beach. It wasn't Costa Rica, thats for sure, but it felt so good to feel the sand between my toes and let the sunshine warm my face. Bridget and I scoured the beach for treasures (she loves collecting sea-paraphernalia) while Barley chased the ball and ran through the ocean. Afterwards we headed back to her and her husbands new house!! It's adorable and cozy, and you feel at home as soon as you walk through the door. Since we are both avid yogi's we started to mess around with some concepts for the nights class that we had discussed on our walk. We both love Mark Whitwell, so the ramble part of my class was inspired by some of what we've connected with in his book Yoga of Heart: The Healing Power of Intimate Connection.

"Enlightenment does not look like anything or conform to any cultural model of perfect behavior or beatitude. It is simply an understanding and enjoyment of the obvious perfection, which is Life."

So often EVERYONE in class is looking around - assessing their neighbors, comparing their poses and their bodies with those of the people around them, instead of realizing that each body and personality and yoga practice is totally authentic. I have been wanting to do a blindfolded class for a while now, so I figured that this would play into the lesson that I wanted to get across. With a blindfold on you can't try to conform to the exact interpretation of the pose from my perspective, or to your neighbors. It is completely and utterly your own. Another great lesson that comes along with the blindfold is the connection to your BREATH.

"To be with the breath is to be with that which is breathing us."

I constantly ramble on about how important your breath is: how it takes you into poses, and out of them...it massages you deeper and tells you when to back off...and it allows your body to relax and absorb any sensations that arise. In LIFE, in YOGA, your breath is EVERYTHING. With your sight removed your whole yoga experience changes, and you realize that your breath is the only thing that will be able to guide you through practice.

Bridget, being my blindfolded guinea pig....

Anywho - Bridget and I messed around at the house, figuring out what worked and what was too confusing or challenging. I also had to be VERY specific with my cues - afterall you weren't able to just look up and find the posture that I was talking you into!

Barley and Bridget in Down DOG....

After coming up with a flow we enjoyed some coffee, snacked a bit, then Bridget read some Nat Geo while I came up with an [instrumental] playlist.

Circling with the breath, blindfolded....

Simply standing in Tadasana becomes a whole new experience with the blindfold....

A blindfolded Bridget binding....

Class was a GREAT success. Of the 11 people there was only one person who said that they DID NOT like it and would love it if he never did blindfolded yoga ever again. Two people approached me about how apprehensive and anxious they were about it during the first several minutes of class. One woman even said that she thought about walking out. But once she relaxed with her breath and TRUSTED her body and breath she was able to simply BE with her experience. I also received 5 text messages after class saying that blindfolded yoga was pretty much the most epic thing that they have ever done in the classroom! All in all, a totally unique yoga experience. Next weeks Wednesday morning Yin we will experiment with eliminating another sense: sound. The yin practice will be TOTALLY silent...the transitions being signaled with my tibetan singing bowl. The practice will be written out on little sheets for everyone and the room will be completely quiet. Yeeeww!! Thanks to my yoga students and to my friends for the constant inspiration to take our classes to the next level!!!

"Simply BE with your experience."

You Are What You Eat

You are what you eat...so take the time to find out where you're food is coming from...

Sunday Funday

Well...Friday night I had to take a bunch of Benadryl. I managed to rally for my powerful vinyasa class the next morning, but as soon as I got home I took more Benadryl and the day was kind of a wash. Well - there was SOME excitement. I went out for lunch with my parents, kinda in a benadryl-haze, when my Dad proclaimed that my mom spilled coffee all over the place upstairs because she knocked it off the bedstand when they were having sex. I was crying because the laughter was so hard, my cheeks were red with embarrassment and I just kept trying to say "Dad, thats enough!!". God bless them...though I find it totally disturbing. 30 years together and a failing body and my Dad still loves to "Diddle" *Yes, embarrassingly enough, this is what he refers to it as. So, after all of THAT excitement, I came home and crashed again. I had plans to go see my friends band play but I simply wasn't up for it. Woke up yesterday with yet another Benadryl hangover and still some itching around my arms and neck. What to do, what to do? I messaged Kylee about going to see a movie, but I couldn't decide which one. Wanderlust @ 11am at Franks theatres on Tilton road, or The Grey @ 1:45pm at Tilton9 theatres on Tilton road? WHY NOT BOTH? I have to say, both movies were AMAZING. Wanderlust was hysterical, about a young couple who has had to make some major changes and somehow ends up in a free-love, hippy commune. It was awesome. After scouring all of northfield for a coffee shop (there are none, by the way) we ended up at McDonalds at their McCafe for Lattes. Kylee threatened to take a picture of me walking into the dreaded McD's, so I figure I'd better admit it upfront. The lattes were actually pretty damn delicious, and I've heard from some fellow foodies that they are actually using Newmans Own Organic beans...? I'll pretend that's fact. After our coffee we made our way to the Tilton 9 for the thrilling, intense new Liam Neeson (*SIGH* ilovehimsomuchitsborderlineedwardcullen) film THE GREY. This is about a broken man taking a job on in Alaska, working with the lowest of lows at an oil refinery. The plane thats taking them back to Anchorage goes down and it's about their journey trying to make it out of the most wicked of conditions, being stalked by wolves. Holy shitballs. I literally sat on the edge of my seat the whole movie.

And now, why let Sunday Funday end there? We headed to the Tilton Bar next for some late afternoon pints of Guinness. Our friend Joe joined us, I left my number for the cute guy who was sitting two down from me - who left when I was playing pool, and then my friend Pam joined as well. Joe went home and then us ladies went to the Bonefish Grill for some appetizers and chit chat.

Home by 9, watched the rest of the Oscars with my family, took ANOTHER bendryl because I was rashing on my chest, and slept in til 10:30 this morning.

....time for Monday Funday?

Benadryl Hangovers and Birthday Plans

So it's one week until my birthday. 25 years old. Ayeyaya. The last birthday that I celebrated in the US was my 20th, so I'm grateful to be able to celebrate with my family. All my yoga girls have planned some pretty fun stuff for me, actually TWO weekends worth of celebrations, which really touched me. Unfortunately we won't be doing Friday night Yin for the next two weeks though because Little Saigon will be closed for a vacation!!

This is probably for the better- apparently I've developed a food a llergy, and one (of the 7 different things) we ordered set me off. So for the past 36 hours I've been fighting off the itchy hives with Benadryl. I was worried about teaching my Saturday morning powerful vinyasa with the Benadryl hangover I had, but everyone in the circle was amazing and inspired me to push through. It was a great class and a great group of women. I hope that everyone's having a great February :)

Yeeew Yoga

Tonights class was binding: here's Jelly in a bound 1/2 Lord of the Fishes.

And the amazing Marja!

A Wednesday night tradition has begun. All levels vinyasa followed by oysters on the half shell at Steve and Cookies, white wine and oracle cards.

Wianno Oysters @ Steve and Cookies Oyster Bar

Me, making the bar pick oracle cards...

New Moon Intentions

Tonight at 5:30pm is the New Moon. Two years ago when I was in california, a friend had told me to set my intentions on the new moon...writing them down in a notebook, because this was an auspicious time of the month that is very powerful. I've never forgotten about it and each month I try to make a list of my intentions. Here's a bit of info I pulled from the web about this moon cycle:

NEW MOON INTENTIONS:

NEW MOON
(when the moon is between the sun and the earth)
The new moon is the phase of the moon when the moon is not visible from Earth, because the side of the moon that is facing us is not being lit by the sun.

Many Hindus believe that if you’re to begin a new task, project, or intention, the new moon is the perfect time to start.

When the moon wanes, it is a time of reflection and introspective thinking. When the moon waxes it is a time to receive what you have sowed. Once the new moon begins to wax (meaning it gets bigger), the start of receiving begins. This is the perfect time to start new things and is also a wonderful occasion to set forth your intentions and manifestations.

On the day of the new moon, WRITE DOWN YOUR INTENTIONS. You may choose to do so in a special journal of yours or you may take a piece of paper and keep it safe.

Remember that you’re setting intentions. Not asking a genie for 3 wishes. This means that you have to put in some effort. Meditate, keep clear of negative thought, purify your mind and body, focus your energy on your intentions, day dream vividly about what would it feel, look, smell, and taste like if your intention came true. Look for the opportunities the Universe is throwing at you. Don’t sit idly by and think that what you want will just fall onto your lap the instant the moon goes dark.

Wishing vs Intending

When you wish for something to happen you’re accepting defeat. You’re saying to the Universe, “I can’t do this for myself so can you pretty please, with a cherry on top, do it for me?” Intending, on the other hand, implies that YOU are incredible, powerful, and have the ability to create your own reality. When you write down your intentions make sure to use verbs such as intend, plan to, am determined to, will, aim to. Don’t use verbs such as wish or hope.

A few days before the new moon, keep your body and mind pure. This means no negative thinking, drop the gossiping, eat right (avoid fast food), and continue with whatever spiritual or personal growth practices you’re doing. This could be meditation, creative visualization, or reading. During this time think about what you truly want to manifest.
On the day of the new moon, go outside where you are physically connected to nature. The moon after all is an element of nature. If possible, find a place near water and light a candle. This way you’ll be surrounded by all four elements: fire, water, air, and earth.
Sitting in a quiet spot, relax yourself by focusing on your breath or doing a short meditation.
Once you feel sufficiently relaxed, take out your journal or a piece of paper and handwrite your intentions. Don’t feel silly if you’ve put down smaller intentions, such as, “I intend to make my orchid bloom.”
After you finish you may recite your intentions followed by an affirmation such as, “I will receive the things that I have intended.”

Basho

The morning dawns
late night soon follows.
Life transient as dew.
Yet the morning glory
unconcerned
goes on blooming, blooming
it's short complete life.

--Basho

An excerpt from Osho's "Zen: the Path of Paradox":

Let the phrase sink into you: it's short complete life. Short but complete. The morning glory is loved very much by Zen people, and the reason is that it opens in the morning and by the evening it is gone. In the morning it was there, so beautiful, so authentic, so real, and by the evening the flower has faded, dropped into the earth, ready to disappear. The morning glory is an exact symbol for life. When the morning glory blooms, in that small life, in that short span, it is complete. It is total; it lacks nothing. Those few moments are enough. Eternity is touched.

Adele: Girl, let me tell you - YOU are powerful and amazing.

MomDate

Had a date with my mom today at Sushi Ocean View...my favorite sush place of all time. Faith is always hooking us up with delicious rolls, and this lettuce wrap was freaking eppppic. Good times, good food, good place, great mom.

Save Me.

Someone please save me from myself. My friend (and yoga student) Kaitlin baked me some gluten free cupcakes for valentines. And they are just as freaking delicious as the ones that Jelly baked me-- which means I have just as little will power to walk away from these little bites of deliciousness. I hope that in the future my students buy me celery or carrot sticks....but, kinda not really ....hahaha.