I have one week left at home...I'm scrambling to make preparations for things at home that will need attending to during absence, I'm scrambling to figure out what exactly I'll need for the upcoming 6 months, and I'm scrambling to love and hug and enjoy the company of all of the people that I'll be missing through half the year. I've never been anxious before a trip in the past, but this trip has my stomach turning in knots. I guess that I've put a bit of pressure on it...my first big trip in over a year and a half, my first trip without my Dad at home to talk to, and leaving my Mom at home all alone. I'm trying to travel without expectations, because that's the only way TO travel, but there's definitely a part of me that is hoping that the travel will help take away some of the sadness I feel, and that the adventure will be enough to fill up the chunks of me that are missing. Anywho, anytime I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed I like to read "Invictus" by William Earnest Henley. It makes me feel okay. I'm the captain of my soul, let this journey begin.
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
for my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance,
My head is bloodied, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll.
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.
"Invictus" - William Ernest Henley