not all who wander are lost.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Awareness.

Nicoles amazing (and freaky) yogi toes.
Playing with Puppies at the Beach.
Sushi Ocean View...the best. Black Dragon Roll (+cream cheese) and Cailin Roll. Boom.
Bill @ Dead Dog making us some "HEROS"
...and then a proper Guinness.
The one thing I've really been focusing on lately has been awareness. Awareness about my relationships, awareness about my intentions, awareness about my emotions, awareness about my body. When I recognize that I'm sad, I figure out where the sadness is coming from and how to respond to it. Sometimes it's the type of sadness that just needs a good cry, and sometimes it's a sadness that just needs a hug from a good friend, a little bit of yoga, and some sunshine. Yesterday- that was the type of day that I just needed to be out.

In my first yoga class of the day I had Nicole, Sue Webb, Michelle, and one of my favorite summer students- Gene. Classes lately have been quality over quantity, and we have gotten to go into a deeper practice than id be able to teach with one of the summer classes (25people!). Nicole has the most freakish "yogi toes" ever, and yesterday I finally captured it on film...

After yoga I headed to the beach for some sunshine...and puppies!!! Bridget was on sumner with her husband and her dog Barley, and then my cousin Jenny came down with her 3, and the sand started flying as the pups swam, played, wrestled and chased the ball. I was in and out of sleep as I laid in my beach chair- moving between contentment and anxiety...with all of dads funeral stuff going on I am just a bit on edge.

Taught yoga class #2 at 4pm to another small but epic group of friends. So many people have asked me how I'm Back to teaching already, but I'd lose my fucking mind if I didn't have this to keep me grounded. Nancy came with flowers, Nicole with chocolates, Gene with gift certificates, Jeannie with a necklace...I've been bombarded with cards and hugs and delicious granola. The yoga community is a *compassionate* community and their support is some powerful stuff.

After yoga I grabbed some sushi with my cousin Jenny. It was great to just relax, enjoy, and laugh. We are trash-talkers from waaaaay back and we had each other in tears as we laughed over all the great times on Sumner ave in years passed.

Fast forward to later in the night and we are at the Dead Dog Saloon, my favorite bar. It was full of locals, and my corner of the bar was full of my favorite people. We ordered a round of "Heros" (see blog below) to toast to my dad, and I gotta say- if my dad drank that he would have said "This is a goddamn pussy drink- that's A LOT anti-Christ", which made us all laugh (and cry) a little bit harder. After sipping down the very-sweet ode to my father, I toasted to him with HIS favorite, a Guinness- or "mothers milk" as he always called it. After that I'd had my limit, I felt like tears were just a blink away so I switched to club soda. Megan Albrecht, Nicole and Phil, JOHNNY DIGENNI, my beautiful Lorraine, Mama Madge, my cousin Jenny, the Mahers (Christian, Jim and Kate), Megan and Tully, Marie....quality people, who's hugs and love and laughter were just what I needed.

Played two songs with Christian but my heart wasn't in it- so I packed it up, said my goodbyes and headed home for bed. Today people start filtering in and flying in for the funeral, and though I hate the reason she's coming, I'm so so so fucking insanely grateful that my best friend Julia is arriving today.

Moving and loving and laughing with awareness.

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