Pie Cry.

I love to cook- especially when I'm happy, and also sad. It's a bit of therapy. I can take a handful or raw materials and create a delicious dish...one that I share with my family and friends. So cooking, for me, is very rewarding. Its something that I'm good at. And though baking isn't really my specialty (you have to FOLLOW recipes, not CREATE them...and you have to use exact measurements, bleh!), I've managed to have great success with fruit pies and key lime pie. So, when I was picking up some ingredients for dinner and saw the cover of this months Bon Appetit magazine, I figured 'what the hell!'! A Blackberry Lime Meringue pie!! I could do that...it's a combination of my two favorite things to bake- key lime and berry pie. Easy peezy. Or so I thought...

On a side note, I've been crying alot- but this is pretty much reserved for the car. It's nothing crazy, but lately the sadness And stress of our current lives situation needs a release. I cry, and then feel a bit of the sadness and anxiety leave, and the weight in my chest gets lighter.

I had a good cry on the way home from the supermarket, but was prepped with my Bon Appetit magazine and a list of yummy things to make for the hoard of family and friends that were at our house- so my feelings were optimistic. I whipped up a bunch of amazing dishes (read the blogs below), and then- the pie. The fucking pie. The insanely-impossible-suicide-inducing fucking pie. You need to be a rocket scientist to decipher the recipe listed in the magazine...and I (naively) attempted. Recipes like this should come with a warning: only to be attempted by expert bakers and people who are 100% emotionally-rock-solid. The kitchen was in shambles, I was covered head to toe in flour and egg, and my arm aches from "vigorously whipping" my lime curd over a "steam bath" for 20minutes. Tired and frustrated, I abandoned my curd and turned my attention to the crust. As I rolled out the dough and laid it in the dish, I began crying. Then sobbing. Then convulsing, buckets of tears poured out of my eyes, caught by my beautifully constructed pie crust. This went on for some time before I got it together and went on to finish this (stupid-goddamned) pie.

Well, it didn't turn out looking ANYTHING like the cover of Bon Appetit, but it tasted alright. The moral of the story is that sometimes ya just need a good cry. Whether it's in your car, or into your pie crust- holding in stress, anger, sadness or any kind of negative emotion will only make matters worse. So cry it out, and then enjoy a happy meal with the people you love. Oh yeah- moral #2: don't attempt any pies in Bon Appetit, no matter how enticed you are by their beauty....

MY Blackberry Lime Meringue....

Bon Appetit's Blackberry Lime Meringue.

FYI: Here's a much easier, and just as delicious way to make this pie (minus the frustration):

Cailin's Suicide and Swear Free Blackberry Lime Pie (meringue optional):

• pie crust (i made mine from scratch, but you can use store bought) *if you want a crispy crust, bake the crust for about 10 minutes @ 350
• at the bottom of the pie crust toss in 2 containers of blackberries (bout a cup and a half), then drizzle with agave nectar, depending upon their tartness
• top the crust and berries with this mixture: 5 egg yolks, 1 can sweetened condensed milk, 2/3 cup lime juice
• Bake in oven at 375 for 25 minutes.
• If you want to put the meringue on top, be my guest, but as far as im concerned meringue can kiss my ass....I'd just top it with some delicious whipped cream! garnish with blackberries.

EasyPeezyPIES

I have two summer pie recipes for you-- a new approach to blueberry pie (thanks to Cindy Leatherwood) and a traditional Key Lime pie!!

Blueberry Pie:
- 2 pints blueberries
- 3/4 cup water
- zest and juice of 1/2 lemon
- 2 1/2 tablespoons corn starch
- 1 teaspoon cinnamon
- agave nectar, to taste (bout 3tablespoons)
A ready-made graham cracker crust

Add all of the ingredients into a skillet, over medium heat. Let it cook down a bit and get a bit "soupy". Then pore it into a graham cracker crust and let cool! Voila! EasyPeezy, eh? I find that if you bake the crust on 350 for 10minutes if gives the crust a bit more sturdiness.

Second on the list is my favorite, Key Lime Pie...

Key Lime Pie:
- 2/3 cup key lime juice
- zest of 1/2 a lime
- one 14oz can Sweetened Condensed Milk
- 5 egg yolks
A ready made Graham cracker crust

Mix all of the ingredients and pour into crust. Add some more zest to the top. Place in an oven that has been preheated to 375 for 20minutes.

All in a days work...

152 Calorie Milkshake?

I can't help it...it's summertime, Carol's Custard is down the street, and after dinner I just want one thing -- ICE CREAM, damnit! SO, after some experimentation in the kitchen - I've nailed it. And it's pretty freakin' simple.

Healthy Chocolate Banana Milkshake:

(this recipe is for one serving)

- 1 medium to large Banana, frozen

- 2 tablespoons raw Cacao Powder

- 1/2 cup Unsweetened Almond Milk

- 1 teaspoon raw Maca Powder (optional)

- 1 teaspoon Wheat Germ (optional)

Peel a banana, stick it in a ziploc bag, and put it in the freezer. The following day when you are ready for this delicious dessert, remove the frozen banana from the freezer. Slice into half inch slices, so as to not kill your blender. In your blender put the sliced up frozen banana, the cacao powder and the almond milk (and the maca powder, if you'd like!). Puree...but not for TOO long, just enough. I also threw in 4 frozen blackberries...sometimes bananas are too "banana-y" for me, and I find that berries cut through the "banana-y" taste and texture. Anyways, you may need a little bit of extra almond milk, but don't put too much in because then it will take on a smoothie consistency as opposed to a proper milkshake-thickness. When it's done, pour it into a nice glass and top with a sprinkling of Wheat Germ (if you'd like)...which adds to the health benefits, and gives it a nice, nutty, well-rounded taste. ENJOY!

banana: 100 calories

2 tablespoons cacao powder: 45 calories

1/2 cup unsweetened almond milk: 17 calories

TOTAL CALORIES: 152 Calories

Recipes from the Monastery: Blackberry SCONES.

The Chef.

Rachael Leina'ala knows how to snack. In a compound that is dominated by Vegetarians, Vegans and Raw Foodies....I take comfort in the fact that she is here, snacking on Potato Chips dipped in Sour Cream + Sriracha! She always hits the nail right on the head with yummy junk food. Last time that I was here she made some Blueberry Scones that rocked my world - and as per my request, she made some this morning!!! Only they were BLACKBERRY scones!! BAH. Such a wonderful way to start off my day....

Rachael's SCONES:

• 1 3/4 cup flour or wheat flour
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 1/3 cup blackberries {or blueberries, or raspberries}
• 2/3 cup yogurt
• 1/3 cup melted butter
• 1/2 teas. baking soda
• 1 teas. baking powder

Combine flour, sugar, powder and soda. Stir in yogurt, butter and berries just until evenly moist. On an oiled baking sheet, spoon dough into equal mounds. Bake at 400 degrees until well browned {about 15-20minutes}.

Just another 10 minutes....

Perfection.

Autumn Meal @ Rochelle's

"Bread is the king of the table and all else is merely the court that surrounds the king. The countries are the soup, the meat, the vegetables, the salad but bread is king."
Louis Bromfield, American novelist (1896-1956)

the view from brad and rochelle's porch.

I love to cook...and I love to eat. I'm not sure which one I like better - they're tied. Everyone {impressed, ahem} is always asking me how I learned my way around the kitchen. Well, there are a select few to thank for that: my parents- who both love to cook, Mary Schmeltzer, and Rochelle. I'd love to expand on the knowledge I've gotten from my parents and Mary, but today we'll just focus on Ro - afterall, she's the one who cooked me dinner last night. We started with homemade chips and the most epic roasted onion dip. Then, fresh out of the oven, was some homemade bread! BAH! BREAD! MY FAVORITE! It didn't need anything - but I still dipped a few hunks of it into olive oil...and the onion dip!

There is nothing better than homemade bread...
I repeat, there is nothing better than homemade bread.

MmMmMm Roast Chicken...

For dinner we had a chicken that was roasted with lemon, garlic and thyme, along with Cauliflower and Fennel. MmMmMm. She did a white wine gravy. And just when I thought that I was so stuffed and couldn't fit in another mouthful - the Rustic Apple Crostata with a Cheddar Crust came out of the oven!


The recipe came from a Martha Stewart recipe, so after scouring the WWW I found this one, and I'm pretty sure it's spot on....

Apple Crostata with Cheddar Crust

Recipe adapted from Martha Stewart
Total time: 2 hours 45 minutes
Makes 1 11 inch crostata

Cheddar Pie Dough
1 1/4 cups flour
1 stick cold unsalted butter, cut into small pieces
1/5th cup ice water
1/2 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
Crust
1 disk Cheddar Pie Dough
Flour, for surface
1 large egg, lightly beaten for egg wash
Filling
2 tart apples plus 2 McIntosh apples, peeled, cored, seeded, and sliced into wedges
1/2 cup granulated sugar
2 tablespoons all purpose flour
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnomon
1/4 cup warmed apricot preserves

Directions for Cheddar Pie Dough

1) Pulse flour and 1/2 teaspoon salt in a food processor until combined. Add butter and pulse until mixture resembles coarse meal (10 seconds). Drizzle the water evenly over the mixture.
2) Pulse until mixture just begins to hold together (dough shouldn’t be wet or sticky). If dough is too dry, add more water. Add cheese and pulse until combined.
3) Shape dough into a disk; wrap in plastic wrap. Refrigerate until chilled, 30-45 minutes.

Directions

1) Make the crust: Roll out the dough to a 13-inch round (about 1/8th inch thick) on a lightly floured service. Transfer to a parchment lined baking sheet and refrigerate for 20 minutes.
2) Make the filling: Toss together the sugar, apples, sugar, flour, lemon juice, and cinnamon.
3) Spread the filling over the dough, leaving a 1 1/2 inch border. Fold the edges to form a crust and then brush with the egg wash. Refrigerate until edges are firm, 30 minutes.
4) Preheat the oven to 375.
5) Bake the crostata until the apples are tender and the crust is golden, about 1 hour and 15 minutes. Let cool and then brush with apricot preserves. * I added the preserves into the filling before it was baked.

I'm going to make this for Thanksgiving, but I'm going to use whole wheat flour and spelt flour instead of the white, and instead of using the 1/2 cup sugar I'm going to use a 1/3 cup of agave nectar :)

Crazy Donna + Peach Pie

Crazy Donna. She's amazing. In her 40's, a local teacher in Ocean City, and an avid surfer. This past winter she was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and she's been fighting the big fight for a couple months now. When I paddled out this morning I was super stoked to see her and her main man, Brian Bowen, in the lineup...she looked AMAZING! She has lost her hair because of Chemo {she's finishing up her 7th - and final- round!!!} but she is rocking a swim cap and looking great! The most romantic part of it all is her boyfriend Brian, who is her "Jet Ski". She holds onto his foot and he paddles her out into the lineup. She paddles, and catches waves - surfing like she's never been sick a day in her life. Then Brian takes a wave in and the process repeats. She was in the water for about an hour and caught a ton of waves. I was so stoked to have her out there, the only thing missing was my Dad!! Donna said that she's been craving pastries lately, so I asked her if she liked Peach Pie. Turns out it's her favorite!! SO, I picked up some local organic peaches and got to slicing. In 20minutes I'll have a hot, fresh, delicious peach pie for our gal. Kudos to Donna for not letting her cancer get her down - and kudos to Brian Bowen for being the World's Best Boyfriend.


Here is a version of my easy peach pie recipe:

Ingredients

• 1 (15 ounce) package pastry for a 9 inch double crust pie
• 5-6 cups sliced peeled peaches (3pounds around a bout)
  
• juice of one lemon
  
• 1/2 cup flour (i've been using Teff Flour)
  
• 2/3 cup Agave Nectar
  
• cinnamon
• nutmeg

Directions

1. Preheat the oven to 450 degrees F
   
2. Peel and slice up the peaches. In a bowl mix peaches, lemon juice, flour, and the cinnamon and nutmeg. Pour into pie shell and top with the 2nd pie crust. Cut several slits in the top crust to vent steam.
3. Bake for 10 minutes in the preheated oven, then reduce the heat to 350 degrees F ( bake for an additional 35 minutes, until the crust is brown and the juice begins to bubble through the vents. I highly recommend placing a cookie sheet underneath the pie because the juice bubbles out and will make a mess of your oven.

This pie tastes best when warm-hot....and even better if you top it with some vanilla ice cream!!

Spicy Honey Nuts

The other day I was having a craving for these Butter Toffee Almonds that I get at Santori's in Somers Point. They are sooo delicious, but definitely have wayyy more butter toffee than they do almond. Ha. SO, I decided to create a version all my own. I have a TON of raw nuts in the house from when I went on my crazy "candida yeast" cleanse, and I haven't touched the nuts since then. Well, I busted out all the bags o'nuts, grabbed the Honey bear {WHOA, I have been on a honey kick...mmm good}, some cayenne, salt and sugar -- and away I went.

Cailin's Spicy Honey Nuts

• 1 pound of raw nuts, your choice. {I used brazil nuts, almonds, cashews and pecans}. *If you want, you can start with already-roasted nuts, cutting one step out of the cooking process. Roasting them yourself is pretty easy so if you only have raw available don't worry.
• cayenne {a teaspoon to a few tablespoons....depending upon your spicy-lovin'-factor}
• 1/4 of sugar {preferrably turbinado or sugar in the raw...it's crunchier!}
• 2 big tablespoons of salt {kosher or coarse ground}
• HONEY. 'bout 6 tablespoons.

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Spread the nuts evenly on a baking sheet pan and spray with some olive oil or vegetable oil...just a very light dusting. Roast the nuts for 10-15minutes. On the stove, heat up the honey and mix in the cayenne pepper. Pour over top of the roasted nuts and make sure that they are evenly coated. NOW, with the oven on 325, roast the nuts for another 10-12minutes. Remove from the stove, sprinkle with the salt and sugar, coating all the nuts, and let them cool {make sure you take a spatula to them sometime before completely cooled otherwise they will be glued to the bottom of the pan!}.

ENJOY.

Fiesta. Fiesta.

Cinco De Mayo. One of my favorite holidays!! I threw a little family fiesta this year and the menu was as follows {all food was homemade, from scratch...obviously}: bean dip, mango salsa, shrimp quesadillas {made by Sharonie}, grilled lime corn, tacos, sopapilla cheesecake, fresh fruit {gracias Pablito!}and sangria {i know, i know, this is from Spain, but whatever! They speak spanish there!}. Here are my recipes:

Mango Salsa:

1 mango

2 red onions

3 tomatoes

2 red bell peppers

1 jalapeno {or more if you like it hot}

juice of 2 limes

small handful of cilantro

2-3 cloves of garlic

*dice it all up, drizzle some olive oil on there, little bit of pepper, and a few generous shakes of salt - voila!

Grilled Lime Corn:

corn on the cob, in the husk {however many you are going to eat}

chili powder

chipotle pepper powder

butter

cilantro

lime

cheese: contija or other mexican cheese. contija looks similar to parmesan sprinkle cheese. you could also substitute feta if you'd like.

*soak the corn in cold water for an hour. fire up the grill on med-high and put on the corn. it will grill for about 20 minutes...more or less depending upon your grill. turn frequently. the outside of the husks will turn golden brown. when they are done, take em off the grill and pull the husks down. you can separate the husks in two and tie them so that they make a handle almost. now time to dress the corn: rub butter on them, sprinkle with chipotle pepper powder and a dash of chili powder...dust with some cheese, squeeze 1/4 of a lime over the corn and then sprinkle with some diced cilantro. BOOM. so delicious.

Sopapilla Cheesecake:

2 packs of cream cheese

2 packages of crescent rolls

pat of butter

cup of sugar

cinnamon

- 9 x 13" baking pan

* preheat the oven to 350. warm cream cheese to room temperature. spray the baking pan with non-stick spray. unroll crescent rolls inside bottom of pan. use 1/2 cup of sugar and mix with cream cheese. spread cream cheese/sugar mixture over crescent dough. unroll second crescent roll dough over top of cheese. melt the bit of butter and brush it over the top layer. mix the remaining sugar and cinnamon together in a bowl and sprinkle over top. bake uncovered for 30 minutes. this should ONLY be eaten for cinco de mayo, considering that the calories and fat in it are through the roof! once a year kinda-dessert.

Sangria:

1 big bottle of red wine

2 cans of ginger ale

1/2 cup of contrieau

fruit

*pour wine into large pitcher, add contrieau and fruit. i used an orange, a lemon, a lime, blueberries, strawberries, and

an apple. the orange, lemon and lime i sliced into thin circles because it looks cute in your glass like that! anyways, put that in the fridge and let sit over night. pour the ginger ale in right before you serve it - and serve over ice!

pablito and me.

aunt ciss, jeff, paulie, shar and dad feasting

sharonie and mom enjoying my grilled lime corn

the "boys" table: dad, my brother and jeff pace.

sharonie says the sangria is GOOOOOOD.

Cinco de Mayo is NOT just about sopapilla cheesecake and salsa:

(wikipedia says...)

Cinco de Mayo (Spanish for "fifth of May") is a regional holiday in Mexico, primarily celebrated in the state of Puebla, with some limited recognition in other parts of Mexico.^[1][2] The holiday commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, under the leadership of Mexican General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguín.^[3][4] The outnumbered Mexicans defeated a much better-equipped French army that had not been defeated in almost 50 years.^[5]

Cinco de Mayo is not "an obligatory federal holiday" in Mexico, but rather a holiday that can be observed voluntarily.^[6][7]

While Cinco de Mayo has limited significance nationwide in Mexico, the date is observed in the United States and other locations around the world as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride.^[8] A common misconception in the United States is that Cinco de Mayo is Mexico's Independence Day,^[9] which actually is September 16 (dieciséis de septiembre in Spanish),^[10] the most important national patriotic holiday in Mexico.^[11]

the battle of the spotted zebralions